Tested, Tried, and Proved
One of the most basic questions that probably every person on this planet will ask themselves at some point in their life is “Why am I here on this Earth?” Some people never figure out the answer in their lifetime, and others make answering it their life’s purpose. I am grateful to have the scriptures to help give me guidance when questions like this come to my mind. There are so many that are centered on this topic, and they have given me a lot of comfort. Here are a few of my favorites:
John 17:3 “This is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.”
Alma 34:32 “For behold, this life is the time for men to prepare to meet God. Yea, behold the day of this life is the day for men to perform their labors.”
Abraham 3:25 “And we will prove them herewith, to see if they will do all things whatsoever the Lord their God shall command them.”
From these few scriptures I have learned that I am on this earth so that I can learn more about my Father in Heaven, prove that I will turn to Him and Choose His plan - even when things get hard, and prepare to live with Him again one day.
I have been studying a talk given by President Henry B. Eyring in the October 2020 General Conference. It is called “Tested, Proved, and Polished.” Here is what President Erying says at the beginning:
“My dear brothers and sisters, I am grateful to speak with you today. My hope is to give encouragement when life seems especially difficult and uncertain. For some of you, that time is now. If not, such a time will come. That is not a gloomy view. It is realistic—yet optimistic—because of God’s purpose in the Creation of this world. That purpose was to give His children the opportunity to prove themselves able and willing to choose the right when it is hard. In so doing, their natures would be changed and they could become more like Him. He knew that would require unshakable faith in Him.”
All of us have been through difficult times in our lives. It is sometimes hard to imagine that a loving Father in Heaven would ask us to go through them. I have 4 kids. My oldest is Bailee - she is married and lives with her husband Hayden in Cedar City. Next Is Austin. He lives with his dad in Riverton. And I have 2 kids who live with me here- a 19 year old named Carter and a 17 year old named Dipper. As is the case with most parents, I hate it when I see my kids having a hard time in their lives. I wish they wouldn’t have to experience disappointments, heartache, challenges, and setbacks. I remember watching them learn how to walk when they were younger. They would stand up and fall down, over and over all day long. Some of the falls they took were really painful, and even occasionally caused a skinned knee or a bruised shin. But every time they fell they would eventually get back up, brush it off, and try walking again. Learning and strengthening themselves as they went. Eventually each of them learned to walk. And now that one skill that seemed so painful and unfair takes them everywhere they want to go. I imagine that is how Heavenly Father sees us in this life. He wishes it didn't have to hurt sometimes, but He knows it will be worth it in the end. President Eyring Said:
“You might reasonably wonder why a loving and all-powerful God allows our mortal test to be so hard. It is because He knows that we must grow in spiritual cleanliness and stature to be able to live in His presence in families, forever. To make that possible, Heavenly Father gave us a Savior, and the power to choose for ourselves by faith to keep His commandments and to repent and to come unto Him.”
14 years ago my life and the lives of my family were drastically changed when I developed a sudden and very severe allergy to nuts. Over time it got much worse, and life threatening. I even became sensitive to miniscule amounts of peanut particles in the air, and would have the airways in my lungs and throat close when I was exposed. I spent a lot of time at doctors offices and in the hospital, trying to understand how to keep myself safe. I would have at least one allergic reaction a week for many years, and eventually realized that I needed to stay at home in order to mostly eliminate them. I was essentially home bound for around 10 years. I had to miss out on so many important events in my children’s lives - basketball games, dance competitions, school plays, and talks in church. I could no longer attend the temple or participate in so many of the events that make life enjoyable. I was isolated, and at many times felt forgotten by those around me, and even my Father in Heaven. In the beginning of this trial I went through different phases. Sometimes I was so mad at Heavenly Father for not healing me, and causing me and those I loved so much pain. More often than not I felt like a horrible mom, daughter, friend, and person because I felt like I was the one causing them pain. I did everything in my power to heal myself physically. But through the spirit I eventually realized that this was a trial that Heavenly Father was asking me to go through. So I had a choice to make. I could either let it make me bitter, or I could allow the refiners fire help me learn and grow.
President Thomas s. Monson said “This should be our purpose—to become more spiritually refined as we make our way through sunshine and sorrow. Were it not for challenges to overcome and problems to solve, we would remain much as we are, with little or no progress toward our goal of eternal life. The poet expressed much the same thought in these words:
Good timber does not grow with ease,
The stronger wind, the stronger trees.
The further the sky, the greater the length.
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.”
Image found in the media library at churchofjesuschrist.org
So, now that we know why we are on this Earth - we have to figure out how to get through it. Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf Said “We know that sometimes it can be difficult to keep our heads above water. In fact, in our world of change, challenges, and checklists, sometimes it can seem nearly impossible to avoid feeling overwhelmed by emotions of suffering and sorrow. I am not suggesting that we can simply flip a switch and stop the negative feelings that distress us. This isn’t a pep talk or an attempt to encourage those sinking in quicksand to imagine instead they are relaxing on a beach. I recognize that in all of our lives there are real concerns. These things are not insignificant. Though we cannot understand “the meaning of all things,” we do “know that [God] loveth his children” because He has said, “Behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”
When bad things happen, when we are facing heavy challenges, when we may not understand all the reasons behind our struggles, here is one thing to always remember: No matter what trial you’re facing, when you’re feeling lost, alone, defeated, or broken, the Savior’s arms are open to receive you. Yes, life can be hard. Really hard. But if we take the opportunity to use our limited energy as we are suffering to turn to the Savior, we can see that He is always there, and He will always come to our rescue. Because He knows exactly what we’re going through. He’s felt it all before. He has experienced suffering of all forms—mental, physical, and spiritual. Everything. He understands. He will not abandon us or forsake us. As I went through my health challenges and realized it was something I was asked to experience in this life, I turned to my Father in Heaven daily, sometimes hourly. My relationship with him grew so much. I now understand Him in a way I never would have if I hadn’t faced such a difficult experience. I have also come to understand the enabling power of the atonement of my Savior, Jesus Christ. I never would have survived those physically, mentally, and spiritualy difficult years without it. In his talk President Eyring said:
“Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ know and love you. They want you to return to Them and become like Them. Your success is Their success. You have felt that love confirmed by the Holy Ghost when you have read or heard these words: “For behold, this is my work and my glory —to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man. “
After many, many long years of waiting upon the Lord, I eventually was able to be physically healed. I don’t have time to go into all of the details here today, but I will be forever grateful that I am able to participate in a more normal life again. One of my favorite parts about trials is that I am able to help people go through their own difficult times, because I understand how they are feeling on a deeper level. Here's what President Eyring said about that:
“The greatest blessing that will come when we prove ourselves faithful to our covenants during our trials will be a change in our natures. By our choosing to keep our covenants, the power of Jesus Christ and the blessings of His Atonement can work in us. Our hearts can be softened to love, to forgive, and to invite others to come unto the Savior. Our confidence in the Lord increases. Our fears decrease. In addition, we must notice the tribulation of others and try to help. That will be especially hard when we are being sorely tested ourselves. But we will discover as we lift another’s burden, even a little, that our backs are strengthened and we sense a light in the darkness.”
Because I have felt isolated, I can help someone who may feel like no one sees them, or feel lonely being away from family. Because I have felt physical pain and hardship, I know that people with chronic illnesses need someone to check in on them often or to have a shoulder to cry on. Because I have experienced the death of a sister, divorce, friends abandoning me, having a child almost die from an accident, and so much more - my eyes and heart are opened further to see those who may be suffering similarly. While I was in the midst of these trials I never thought I would be grateful for them. But I really am. I am grateful for the things they have taught me. I am grateful that they help me feel more love and compassion. I am grateful that they brought me closer to my family, and to my Heavenly Father and Savior. I am grateful that they made me stronger, and who I am today.
In closing President Erying said:
“I have seen people rise to great heights through proving faithful in terrible trials. Across the Church today are examples. People are driven to their knees by adversity. By their faithful endurance and effort, they become more like the Savior and our Heavenly Father. I express my gratitude for the many faithful members of the Church of Jesus Christ who bear burdens with steady faith and who help others to bear theirs as the Lord seeks to polish them a little more.”
I want to close with my own testimony. If any of you are going through your own time being tested, proved, and polished - hold tight to the knowledge that like babies learning how to walk, your difficult times can make you stronger and eventually take you everywhere you want to go. And just like your children have loving parents holding their hands as they stumble, you have loving Heavenly Parents who are right there with you, cheering you on. You can do it!
